Published June 28, 2012 by Miss Pamstar


My heart is torn and tears literally rolling down my face as I’m writing this article; my heart was filled with anger and so much hurt when I watched the documentary on SABC 3 (Sunday, 24 june), (The worst place to be gay in the world). The ignorance and the hatred in the hearts of Ugandans towards homosexuals is despicable to say the least. The fact that they say homosexuals should be killed with a straight face is just pure B S.  Well, the documentary was heart breaking not more than the fact that another Lesbian was attacked in her own home and shot in cold blood for her sexuality. I mean this is just too freaking much, how much more can we live in fear of our lives. South Africa being the most advancing African country with rights for homosexuals yet we still read about our own being killed and raped everyday and nothing is being done about it. *in tears* this breaks my heart so much to think that I just recently relocated to this city with the most homophobic crimes than where I come from.  I keep asking myself what is it exactly that activists are fighting for? I mean I do my bit in fighting for the LGBTI rights to be exercised in our country, but whenever I hear, see and read such dreadful stories about my fellow sisters and brothers being raped and brutally murdered and justice is not done I get pissed off! The fact that after so many years that homosexuality has been acknowledged by the government to be legal and is equally recognized as a constitutional right, but still homosexuals are being mistreated by all, including the government officials. I fail to understand why we are still treated as a separate group yet we are denied separate rights like the fact that “corrective rape” should be acknowledge as a different crime than to be treated the same as the heterosexual rape. This is one of many other equality rights that we are fighting for in our rainbow nation country. The fact that justice is not served quickly to South Africans as it was to the Annie Dewani case raises a question to me, as to why are we South Africans not enjoying our democracy that our South African people fought for? I don’t mean to be political I just want to understand how long are we going to live like this? What have we done so bad to be treated like this?

Maybe we should look at ourselves first, activists do their bit but, what about the rest of the homosexual community? Think about it if we stood together in the fight for our rights maybe, just maybe we could be heard and taken seriously. I feel that heterosexuals are ungrateful beings, as far as their complains are concerned, they still get infected with HIV/AIDS but the governments supply them with free condoms the only thing that comes out of their mouths is “choice (condoms) this, choice that” like really now. They get free education about their sexual behavior in the media. What about us? I know maybe I sound as if I’ve got something against heterosexuals, I don’t know maybe I do I just don’t see it. It might be because most of the crimes directed at homosexuals the perpetrators are heterosexuals. Not that I despise all heterosexuals my family and other friends of mine are straight, I think I have a problem with the ones that are homophobic. This article is not to for me to bitch about heterosexuals; it is just a question I’ve had in my mind that is this how we are supposed to live?

Two weeks before I wrote this article I had a shock of my life and I was disgusted as well. I was with my other “acquaintances” well I call them that because I don’t feel after that conversation they deserve the title of being called my friends. Anyway I was with these girls and we are all proudly out of the closet lesbians as they say it. Apparently there was an email going around of a gay guy who was bashed in some township and the victim dresses as a drag queen, so what happened is the perpetrators beat this guy up and took his wig and they were throwing it amongst themselves and this poor gay guy was sitting down with his high heels in those pictures. What shocked me is the way that these girls I was with were laughing as they were telling this story; I didn’t find any amusement in that I looked at them with fury they asked me if I was okay. I just felt I should give them a piece of my mind and tell them exactly how I felt about that. I nearly cried that day thinking how childish and insensitive of them to laugh at such a horrible thing. I asked them what if one of them could get attacked for being lesbian, will they expect me and other activists to run around to help and support them. I mean obviously I will but at that time I was so angry I couldn’t believe their ignorance.

I thought to myself if we homosexuals find amusement when one of us gets attacked what kind of message are we sending out there to the public? Come on people its emails like those and idiotic comments like the ones they were throwing during the conversation that make the world not to take us seriously. I am a survivor of homophobia, and I am doing my bit to fight it that no one ever has to go through it. What are u doing?



Aluta continua!



  • Its trully sad to experience discrimination of one by another in the LGBTI community…But I guess like any community there are small minded people…if we could have activists/advocate mentality a lot could be achieved.

    • it just goes to show how small minded other people are, and worse part is it can happen to any1. well not everyone is born to be an activist but supporting those who are can make a huge difference.

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